There’s nothing basic about my style…except maybe my obsession with this basic.

One thing about me? I’ma wear a white tank top.

Film photography by: Shotbyfwe

Blame it on old Calvin Klein ads, or the fact ribbed tanks are stitched into the culture, but I will always shamelessly stand beside a white tank top.

Most people have a favourite basic. White tall tees didn’t pop off in the early aughts for nothing! Et while a ribbed tank is hardly groundbreaking as the perfect canvas for any style story, she still deserves her flowers.

Maybe my loyalty started in childhood, when a white ditsy floral undershirt was shoved over my big head before a cozy sweater or a pair of overalls layered over top. We were forced to give up nap time, but they never took our undershirts!

Et did I even stand a chance when Beyoncé kicked off her solo career in a white racer back, silver detailed Prada tank??? Was I designed to resist when the checkered straps of the G-Unit muscle tanks swept my middle school like the plague?*

Left: Beyoncé in Crazy in Love, Right: 50 Cent in Wanna Get to Know You

Thus: The White Tank Theory. A dissertation, if you will.

Because despite what a viral haul might tell you, basics are fundamental. They are the silent yet strong soldiers of the wardrobe: fighting off cold in the fall/winter et carrying the canvas in the spring/summer. All while being a buildable.

To put it in makeup terms, a white tank is the Danessa Myrick Universal Yummy Balm. She does everything, for everyone, forever always.

In celebrity terms, it is the Rihanna. She’s always ri-inventing herself et her reign simply won’t let up.

Since this is a thesis you’re probably wondering if I have evidence to my claim, et well, I do!

Across socializing, fraternizing, dillying (with a side of side of dallying) et the odd moment of professionalism, the white tank has met me where I’m at et who. At every story she has risen to occasion, but still, allow me to present Exhibits A through F in support of The White Tank Theory:

Exhibit A

A distressed Zara ribbed tank with linen INDOCHINO trousers (tailored down into Bermudas) et the Sporty & Rich x Adidas Spezials. Here the white tank plays a crucial role in a look that exposes my past of Avril Lavigne-listening et skater boi-pining. Some people heal their inner child, some people reveal their inner child. Potato, potato.

Exhibit B

You’ve heard of Y2K, but a Katherine Hamnett-inspired graphic tank from Etsy with a sequin midi skirt—a look inspired by everyone’s favourite author, et worn during the week of the And Just Like That finale—I fear this is Y2YAY!

Exhibit C

This might be the tank that inspired this whole shebang. My man once went to New York, wandered somewhere near the Loom Shops in Brooklyn (do not remember where exactly), saw this tank, et thought of me. We’d never even discussed the white tank lore before. But he knew. Seee—even someone else sees it.

Exhibit D

Oh, the romance of it all! Where this tank was grungy Y2K before, it’s now softer, girlish. The beaded headband is actually a choker I’ve never worn as a choker, et the Dries skirt is one of my forever favorites. Highly recommend for: frolicking, romantic reading in tall grass, or twirling in hills alive with the sound of music.

Exhibit E

The thing about using basics as a go-to is the re-up. I run through them like Travis Porter. This one from GAP has recently been laid to pasture. Demoted to sleep shirt. But a final lap with tuxedo pants.

Exhibit F

A true definition of high to low dressing. A Walmart 6-pack Hanes tank with vintage D&G. Celebrities, they’re just like us!

For better or worse, this is my evidence that a white tank can see you through Vaseline face-smothered childhoods to professional dates et all the other in-betweens.

When you’re bored, when you’re overwhelmed by trends, when you want to spotlight a vintage skirt or family heirloom, a white tank pulls through every time.

So yes, ladies, themies, gents, et opps: the evidence is clear. The White Tank Theory holds. I don’t make the rules, but I confidently abide by this one.

FOOTNOTES:

*This never broke a single dress code violation by the way.

Closet Dive: The White Tank Theory